If you’ve been a giver or receiver of a promise ring, you know that it has many attached symbolisms behind it. It does not matter if you are the giver or the receiver, when a promise ring is given; the promise to the symbol should be and must be kept.

There are four reasons a promise ring is given. The first reason (usually the main one) is a promise of pre-engagement. Most young couples that want to wed or get engaged may find themselves too young for this sort of thing. So, a promise ring that is given from a man to a woman entails that the couple are made for one another, just not able to commit right then.

The second reason is to keep a vow of chastity. Parents are the typical givers of these kinds of promise rings. Why? It’s their way of showing that they understand the pressure their child is under to have sex without marriage. It’s a way for the child to let parents know they’ll stay sex free until marriage. On the flip side of this promise ring, parents will also give their child the ring as a promise to be drug, alcohol and tobacco free.

Couples who value monogamy, but don’t yet want a marriage can exchange promise rings or give promise rings as a way to signify their love and commitment without a piece of legal binding paper.

The last reason promise rings are a good idea is to remind someone of a friendship. Friends who really care about one another tend to make pacts. This reminder of friendship helps when the person you choose to give a promise ring moves away. They’ll always know that you are thinking of them and will help them when they need it.

So which finger should a promise ring go on? Well, for matters of the heart either the left or right ring finger will do for pre-engagements and monogamy. If the ring is to symbolize abstinence, the left ring finger should be where it goes. Eventually, this is to come off and be placed with an engagement and/or wedding ring. For cases of substance abstinence, any finger will do. However, left ring finger is preferable. If a friendship promise ring is being given, then any fingers, thumbs too, are fine.

Women sometimes wonder if it is appropriate to give a man a promise ring? Although not inappropriate, it’s generally not done. Would you give a man an engagement ring? Chances are: probably not. However, if you are doing a joint promise on monogamy or want to show the man your complete friendship for life, then a simple promise ring or matching promise rings are just fine.

Remember that a promise ring can signify anything so it’s important to give a reason by your giving of a promise ring. If you don’t, it’s liable someone’s feelings can be or will be hurt.